Monday, April 7, 2014

Mom Island

Just like so many other women out there who are moms, I have learned what it feels like to be on Mom Island. You know, that place where no one speaks your language, you are surrounded by crying and other attempts at basic communication, and even though you have a phone and a car somehow you feel alone. So naturally you do not acknowledge the lonely feelings. Instead you simply get up and tackle the day the same way you always do. You meet the needs of everyone else around you who depends on you and do the best job you know how. And if you are anything like me, you are the only one who sees all the stressors running in the background. You are the only one who feels pressures from every angle but keeps going as if Ring around the Rosy IS your only concern.

Just as I anticipated the beginning of 2014 to be challenging, it has proven me right! Before this year even started I told myself I would reach out to others more and I would ask for help if I needed it. And once again I have not done this....until last week. I found myself driving for miles after my "E" light came on with no plans to stop for gas. Call it almost-8-months-pregnant hormones, call it exhaustion from a 2 year old that wont stay in his new big boy bed at night, or call it good old self pity I don't know, but I reached that point where I just plain ran out of gas. As usual I turned to God with an even greater focus and attention than I (sadly) allow for most days. As I prayed I began to realize that He has put so many amazing, Christian friends in my life. People who would be sad to know that I was holding back from leaning on them in the hectic times because I don't want to burden them. I put myself in their shoes for a moment and thought about how great it makes me feel when God uses me to bless others. It is the best feeling when I am able to be there to support someone who needs a hand. So I did that thing we moms find more difficult than shouldering the weight of the world with a smile on our faces. I reached out and asked for help. Well, for prayers really. I actually used my phone to have a real conversation about how much I am struggling and sent a couple texts asking for prayer (hey, its 2014, its what we do!). Of course, I had to preface these messages with "I am ok" and "no one died" because it is so rare that we women reach out for emotional support that others seem to think the worst when we do! Its sad really. But let me just tell you what our God did for me. He reminded me that He purposefully placed people in my life who would love to be there to listen and pray for me. And He sent more comfort and encouragement than I could have asked for.

I have had friends cook amazing, homemade dinners and invite me over, I have been offered babysitting (which I actually took them up on) and saw a movie (NOT animated even!), I have had visitors, play dates, and phone calls. God has truly blessed me with friends who are the perfect examples of what Christian friendships should be. I feel guilty sometimes for getting to that point when I know that God is always by my side each and every moment and yet I sometimes feel alone. I hate that my faith feels lacking in times like that. But its incredibly comforting to know that He will send the right people into my life at the right times so that I may experience His love and encouragement in a human way. I wanted to share my recent experiences in hopes that others out there on their own Mom Island might have the courage to reach out. I imagine God has strategically placed at least one person in your life who is ready to listen and pray and give you that hug you need. Its amazing what such a small gesture can do to lighten the load.

1 comment:

  1. We were not designed to handle the load alone =-)) Reaching outside of our selves isnt always easy but GOD loves the idea of "collaboration" no matter how small a gesture it maybe. love ya!

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